Let’s talk about the quandary of the assistant principal.
I'm thinking about this topic because just a few days ago, I had the privilege of presenting to a room chock-full of assistant principals from across the state of Indiana.
If you’re a principal, you might stop reading now, but also maybe not, because some of the things I say here might be nice for your assistant to hear— in person, from you.
The assistant principalship is a uniquely complicated position. Your job is to be loyal to the principal, aligning with their vision, actions, and expectations.
Yet you are also the holder of your own hard-won opinions and perspectives.
This dual role is one I’ve watched, discussed, and studied extensively. In fact, I dedicated my entire dissertation to the role of high-level assistants. I called it “Second in Command.”
And I lived it. I spent almost six years as a middle school assistant principal, working for three different principals
I remember those days vividly. They were formative. They were hard. There were times I thought, “I am maxed out. I can’t possibly work any harder than I’m working right now.” I literally couldn't have walked faster, filled more minutes, or held more conversations.
All the while, I was trying to please, to stay in the good, supportive graces of the principal.
The Shift
At the beginning of my AP tenure, I planned to stay there. “I never want to be a principal,” I told my boss at the time. “I don’t think I could do it.”
She scoffed. “Of course you can.”
I didn’t believe her.
Then, I spent several years watching her, learning, and collecting experiences like pennies in my pocket. I did the same with my other principals. I filed away what I loved about their leadership—and, crucially, I also started to file away what I would not do if I were ever in that chair.
That’s when the shift starts. You begin thinking, “If…”
And then “if” becomes “when.”
When "when" becomes the lens through which you view leadership—“When I am a principal, I will be sure to…”—it’s not long before you're scrolling through job postings, updating your resume, and weighing commutes. You’re making a list of your strengths and discussing the possibility with your family and friends. You start to think: Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. Maybe I can do this.
Are You Ready for "When"?
Some will happily stay assistants, and some will become principals. Which path to take is sometimes determined by desire, and other times by circumstances.
If you are an assistant principal today, and you’re navigating whether to pursue a principalship, here are a few things to keep in mind:
It’s okay to change your mind. You can be against the idea one day and do a 180-degree turn the next. You don’t owe anyone consistency. It’s your life, and it’s your career. Fluidity is fine.
Don’t sell yourself short. End of sentence. Your capabilities are likely greater than you realize.
Be ready for a door that opens. It's one thing to choose not to walk through an open door; it's entirely another to be caught without your shoes on. Don't let opportunity leave you inside, staring at your regrets.
Have faith in the timing. Opportunities come on their own schedule. Focus on the work, and the right thing will happen.
Still not sure? Think of Alice.
Think back to the worst boss you’ve ever had.
You'll be better than that, wouldn't you?
When I was measuring my own confidence, I thought of the worst boss I ever had—I'll call her Alice. She ran a strawberry patch, and I was a picker. I was twelve. She was mean. She didn't pay a decent wage, and treated all her employees terribly.
I knew, without a doubt, I would be better than Alice.
I bet you will be, too.
I close with a huge hug of thanks to every assistant principal out there. And a note of reassurance and validation: Yes, the work is, in fact, just as hard as it seems to be.
Let’s stay curious,
Jen
P.S. Thanks, IASP! The Indiana Association of School Principals is a true class act!
P.P.S. No A.I. is used in writing this newsletter. It’s just me and my keyboard. And a little spellcheck.
P.P.P.S. Have you heard about the referral program? Click the unique referral link and share with some friends. I shipped out a couple books today!